No Man’s an Island – Episode 8 with Ben West

How to choose a therapist:

If you’re reading this, there’s a good chance you’re thinking about starting therapy. Maybe for the first time. That’s no small thing. Getting to this point takes guts. Acknowledging that things might not be quite right and deciding to do something about it is a massive first step. So first off, well done.

We know choosing a therapist can feel overwhelming. There are a lot of options, and it’s easy to get stuck not knowing where to start. That’s why we created our Get Matched service. It’s designed to take some of the stress out of finding the right person for you.

Still not sure who’s right? That’s okay. Here are a few things to keep in mind.

Figure Out What You Need

Before anything else, try to get clearer on what’s going on for you. Are you struggling with anxiety, depression, or something that feels harder to describe? Maybe it’s your relationships or how you see yourself. Whatever it is, having a rough idea of what you want to work on can help guide your search.

Some therapists specialize in certain areas. Others work more generally. If you’re not sure what you need, ask. A good therapist will be honest about what they can help with.

Think About What Makes You Comfortable

Therapy only works if you feel trusting enough to talk. So the relationship matters. Here are a few questions to help you figure out what feels right.

• Would you rather speak to someone over video from your own home, or in person somewhere else?
• Do you feel more at ease with someone who listens quietly, or someone who’s more direct?
• Would you benefit from seeing someone who understands your background or experience?

There are no right answers here, just what works for you.

Look Beyond the Letters

Every therapist listed on Men’s Therapy Hub is licensed with a professional body. That means they’ve been trained and follow a code of ethics. So you don’t have to worry about whether someone’s legit. They are.

Instead, focus on what else matters. What kind of therapy do they offer? What do they sound like in their profile? Do they come across as someone you could talk to without feeling judged?

Try to get a sense of how they see the work. Some will be more reflective and insight-based. Others might focus on behavior and practical strategies. It’s about what speaks to you.

Test the Waters

Many therapists offer a free or low-cost consultation phone call. Use it to get a feel for how they work. You can ask about their experience, how they structure sessions, payment options, and what therapy might look like with them. A few good questions are:

• Have you worked with men facing similar issues?
• What does your approach involve?
• How do your sessions usually run?
• How do I pay for sessions?

Pay attention to how you feel during the conversation. Do you feel heard? Do you feel safe? That gut feeling counts.

It’s Okay to Change Your Mind

You might not get it right the first time. That’s normal. If something feels off or you don’t feel like you’re making progress, it’s fine to try someone else. You’re allowed to find someone who fits. Therapy is about you, not about sticking it out with the first person you meet.

Starting therapy is a big decision. It means you’re ready to stop carrying everything on your own. Finding the right therapist can take time, but it’s worth it. The right person can help you make sense of things, see patterns more clearly, and move forward with strength and clarity.

You don’t have to have all the answers. You just have to start.